Whats So Great About the Other Side?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Let me ask you this... When you were in the bathroom, why did you shake your dick 3 times after you were done taking a piss? Why not twice? Or 4 times? (I was in the bathroom with you. I know it was 3 times.) Or if you're a female, why did you do, uh, whatever it is you do? Point is, you don't think about these things. You just do them. Let me let you in on a little secret: Chickens could give a fuck less about crossing roads. They are all about starting bands.

Perhaps I've already lost you. There is too much to explain at this time. All that I ask of you is to keep your eyes open and your mind emancipated. A good story is like Chinese water torture: the longer it drips, the worse it gets. No, I mean, then longer you are there, the more effective it is. Holy shit now I've confused myself. Look, we've got a really bizarre story to tell. I think you'll find it's well worth the read. We're talking chickens and scientists and almost certainly extremely graphic sexual content and/or violence. Worse case (or best case?) scenario you pull a "Carradine" when we are done fucking with your brain.

So bookmark this page or just let 'Sucker Punch Thrill Kick' marinate in your intestines until it turns into a wet fart. Either way we are not going anywhere and we hope you'll stick around for the mind fuck of your life. Or, at least the mind hand-job of your life.